For God, whom I serve in my spirit in the preaching of the gospel of His Son, is my witness as to how unceasingly I make mention of you, always in my prayers making request, if perhaps now at last by the will of God I may succeed in coming to you. For I long to see you in order that I may impart some spiritual gift to you, that you may be established; that is, that I may be encouraged together with you while among you, each of us by the others faith, both yours and mine.
For God, whom I serve in my spirit...
Spirit (4151) – In Greek; Pneuma – It is used the following ways in scripture:
Primarily denotes the wind, related to the Greek word Pneo which means to breathe, blow. Breath; the spirit which like the wind is invisible, immaterial, and powerful
The immaterial part of man
the element in man which perceives, reflects, feels, desires
Purpose, aim
The character
The moral qualities and activities
The inward man (an expression used only of the believer)
In other words, Paul serves God with the deepest part of Himself. With the very part of his being that makes him who he is. He serves with the deepest, most intimate part of himself. He served from deep integrity and Godly motivation. He serves God with his most heartfelt desires and drives. This is no mere outward activity. This is the kind of dedication that would hold up in the face of persecution and hard times. In fact, did. Paul often suffered persecution for preaching the gospel of Christ. This was his deep and abiding passion, task, drive. And he did it with utmost diligence and faithfulness.
So much of what I do is only superficial. So much of what I do, I would willingly change when the going gets tough and the hard times comes. God, I do not serve you with my spirit. I do not serve you with my deepest, most heartfelt desires and motivations. So little of what I hold dear runs that deep in me. I lack that depth of conviction and motivation. God forgive me for living a shallow, empty life of activity for activity sake. Help me to pursue a life of Godly devotion that runs to my core, that takes root in the deepest part of my being; the kind that causes one to give his very life for it.
Paul calls upon God as his witness for how often Paul made mention of these believers. He was committed to these believers whom he had never met. He had a God given burning desire to see them, to be with them, and to mutually encourage each other. And isn't that the way it ought to be? Should we not have a deep, burning desire in our hearts to encourage and be encouraged by other believers? Are we not to be about the ministry of uplifting and edifying one another? Yet, so often in my life I am so wrapped up in my own little world that it is an inconvenience to do a simple task of taking a meal to friends when they are sick or simply incredibly busy. How often do we miss opportunities to encourage one another because we are too busy. Busy...doing what? I have no excuse, no legitimate reason for my busyness. I allow too many trivial things into my life. Again, God forgive me for lacking in love and concern for your saints; my fellow brethren. Remove the callous from my heart and burn your love in its place. Fill my heart with love and concern that runs so deep I can hardly stand it! Burn a passion and purpose in the very fibers of my being and fill me with the grace and mercy to bear it! Help me to love someone other than me.
Oh God, how short I fall! Thank you very sending your son to bridge the gap. Thank you for your mercy, so undeserved. Thank you so much for your grace, so unearned! Thank you for your forgiveness, so....amazing and incredibly undeserved. I am a product of your grace...nothing more, nothing less. I deserve none of it. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
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