The Road - Part 3

The Road Part 3

The family room faded and the desert road once again opened up before us. The messenger continued his monologue.
“The death of his first love, Amanda, His wife, and his daughter fed his anger and hatred of God. He continued to turn his back on God time and time again. He turned to alcohol. He could never keep a job and ended up losing his home. He had no family, so he lived on the streets, stealing food to live. He was angry and bitter at years of pain. He blamed God for it all and refused to believe in Him.”
And so the journey went. Scene by scene of his life played through. With every one, my heart would be wrenched with grief. Choice after choice led to deeper acts of sin. Those acts of sin lead to more bad choices and his life spiraled down out of control. With every scene become more and more burdened. His shoulders slumped more and his feet became to drag, kicking up a trail of dust. He began to walk slower and more carelessly, stumbling and tripped over pebbles.
All at once, he stumbled and fell. I waited for him to get up, but he made no attempt to do so. “NO!” I screamed. “Don't give it! There is still hope! Please! Why doesn't he see! Why won't he...”
The messenger held up his hand to stop me from speaking.
I persisted, “Can't you help him?”
“No. And neither can you. He cannot be helped until he willingly acknowledges that he has sinned against God and seeks Him.”
“Well, make him see! Make him understand!”
Still he refused to get up. He lay with his face in the dirt muttering. I could not discern what he was saying, so I knelt down next to him. I put my ear to his face and then I heard it.
“I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you.” He repeated it over and over again.
I cried tears of anguish and desperation. It was so simple to me. I could not understand why he refused. I made not attempt to stop the tears. I let them flow. As they came, I prayed. I prayed fervently for God to heal his heart, to soften it, to make him understand and see. The harder I prayed, the more the tears came. When I was exhausted and worn out, I lay on the ground next to Sam and listened to him breath deep and heavy breathes. As I listened to him, I began to make out words. I was suddenly aware that he was speaking. I sat up and leaned close with my ear to hear.
“Why God? Why? All I ever wanted was to serve you. Why would you allow such things to happen to me? Why would you take everyone who I cared about?”
“Because I was not your first love.” The messenger stood over us now and spoke with such tenderness. “I wanted your love before anyone or anything else. Love me first now.”
I sat up with sudden realization.
“I can't. I can't. I have already rejected you.”
“But I have not rejected you. I have chosen you as my own. I want you. I will pursue you until you cannot refuse me.” The messenger knelt next to Sam and placed his hand under Sam's chin. Gently, he lifted his face so that they were eye to eye. “You may have rejected me, but I have always been faithful to you. I love you. I gave my life for you.”
Sam cried out as in pain, jerked his face away, and sobbed great tears of pain and agony. “I am not worthy! I am not deserving! I have done so many terrible things in my anger at you! I can't.” His face pressed against the dirt, tears soaking the ground, he cried and cried, his body shaking from the force of his grief.
“No, you can't. But I can. And I did. For you. I loved you in my mercy and gave myself in grace. I have given you all you need to accept my precious gift. Believe and cry out to me and you will be mine forever.”
“Sam was still crying so hard that he could not immediately answer. He forced himself to gain control. He lifted his head to look at the messenger once again. With conviction and resolve he cried out, “I believe, my Lord, I believe. I have always believed. I have hated you and blamed you for inflicting so much pain on me. Now I understand you were drawing me to Yourself and teaching me to love You first. I accept. I submit my life to You. Forgive me, my Lord for rejecting and sinning against you.”
Tears were streaming down the messengers face now. He gently leaned down and removed the pack from Sam's back. He threw it down, leaned down, and picked Sam up in His arms. He lifted Him gently and turned around. Gently and lovingly He said, “Look, my child, I have already forgiven you.”
I turned to where He was looking and suddenly understood. In the face of the cliff before me was a cross and an open tomb etched larger than life. Upon seeing the cross and tomb, Sam smiled. The guilt, pain, anger, and hatred gone. It seemed that a hundred years had been shed from his being. He snuggled close to the messenger, who was really His Lord and Savior, as he was carried from the desert wasteland of death, past the cross, and into the eternal valley of life.